Friday 15 November 2013

one day at a time

Hello everyone, didn't want to end the week without updating, but things at home are pretty much the same... we have peaceful days and then along comes another fight.
 
I was hoping for some huge breakthough in my therapy session, but nothing like that happened. My therapist says I'm not ready to leave Josh just yet and I should focus on myself, my boundaries and self respect, to stop the codependency. This can take months. She also suggested we had couples' therapy. I asked Josh but of course he said no, therapy isn't for him, there's nothing wrong with him, blablabla... obviously.
 
Meanwhile his bankroll isn't getting any bigger and I'm considering my options, leaving is looking pretty good to me, but... the house, the relationship, what will become of Josh... those things still worry me enough not to let me move out.
 
Now with the Micro Millions in PokerStars we'll see if he wins something amazing and something changes. Or not. As for me, I'm not in a good mood right now.
 
Hope you guys are doing good!
 
xoxo
Andrea

PS: Someone asked me what platform I use to keep this site, but I can't find that comment, it's gone. Anyway, I use Blogger, not Wordpress. Blogger has several themes you can use, this green one with the poker chips fit perfectly :)

37 comments:

  1. That comment asking about what platform you're using probably came from a Spam comment. That's one of the many memes they use to make you think they might be real. Although it's ridiculous on its face since anyone can tell you use blogger since "blogspot" is part of your URL.

    Have a nice weekend.

    But....your blog is now popular enough to be getting spam comments. Congratulations.

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    Replies
    1. Yep, I thought the person was a complete newbie and it didn't hurt to help him/her out.

      Not sure that's a good thing though. As popular as this blog may be, I haven't received a single comment from women in the same situation or similar to mine. :\

      Delete
    2. Perhaps you are simply in a league of your own?

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    3. no offense but those women would of seen thru the bullshit and left the dude. i know i know josh is amazing.also therapists r the snake oil sellers of the 20th century and beyond.

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    4. Something keeps telling me Josh and your therapist are milking you for all your worth, hope i am wrong.

      PPP, she is in a league of her own, no woman in there rite mind would put up with this Josh Conman.

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    5. Excuse me? Didn't you read my post where I mentioned a 40 year old woman who got tricked into spending THOUSANDS of dollars in "business trips" for her husband only to find out he was cheating with a ton of other women?

      This isn't a league of my own. Your comments are not constructive and just plain cruel. I'm not stupid, I'm not retarded, I'm not some lazy ass woman who can't live her life and refuses to see through all the bullshit. I could be your sister, your mother, your colleague at work. Codependency is real and I don't have to come here and defend myself against those who don't even believe in counselling. What do you expect? For me to leave Josh? Ok, point taken. Not going to do it until I'm ready. Deal with it. And stop the nasty comments.

      Delete
    6. These comments are no where near "cruel," especially by internet message board standards. If they bother you, perhaps this blog was not such a good idea.

      Anyway, good luck figuring things out . . .

      Delete
  2. You plan to pay all expenses until Josh's bankroll recovers from its current EUR 2000 to a level that can sustain withdrawals. He couldn't sustain EUR 5000 before, so he must win at least EUR 3000. You previously estimated that he won EUR 450 per month. This might be lower with his current reduced bankroll. So it will take more than six months before Josh contributes any money. Do you plan to support him for at least six months?

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    Replies
    1. I haven't thought about a time limit yet, it will depend on how the relationship goes and how I feel about helping him.

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  3. What does your rent cost? You mentioned utilities already.

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  4. I'm sorry he refused to go to counseling with you. That must be difficult to hear.

    s.i.

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    Replies
    1. In Josh's world, it's totally fine to be 30 and unemployed and mooching off your gf who has you on the payroll in order for you to have some incentive to be a good boyfriend, and you still emotionally abuse her and treat her like shit anyways.

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    2. in TBC's world too. see every1 has a twin. LMAO

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    3. What is the point of counseling? There is no communication misunderstanding here. Josh feels entitled to financial support to pursue his dreams of earning $3 per hour at poker. Andrea disagrees. Right now, she is agreeing to disagree. This blog is her way of getting support to build the strength to kick Josh's lazy ass to the curb.

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    4. First of all, Josh doesn't "treat me like shit". Unless you are assuming that asking for my finantial help in exchange for doing all the domestic work is treating me "like shit". Other than that he treats me well, he is kind, sweet and funny with me. I just don't write about that side of Josh here. Friday I got home and he had gotten me flowers, for instance. He also does many other "boyfriend stuff" that I don't brag about. Do you think I'd still be with him if it was ALL bad? I'm not that sick.

      Counselling would be good because there are MANY communication minsunderstangins, yes. He doesn't accept my view and an unbiased third-party could help him see things he denies about himself.

      This blog isn't a way to get help on leaving Josh. As I've said a million times before.

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    5. Nobody wrote "shit". Problem is:

      1) You never signed up to support a house-husband.
      2) Josh selfishly indulges a 30-hour/week hobby.

      Get a domestic partner who will keep his hair and not lose his temper.

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    6. who said josh treated u like shit? he just isnt a pro poker player. PERIOD.if he is then i am a pro golfer and lottery ticket scratcher bcuz i have made more money at both.if u want to support him,so b it. now how is the dog?and the tattoo situation?

      Delete
    7. LionsFan247 wrote: In Josh's world, it's totally fine to be 30 and unemployed and mooching off your gf who has you on the payroll in order for you to have some incentive to be a good boyfriend, and you still emotionally abuse her and TREAT HER LIKE SHIT anyways.

      Hmm the dog is ok and I got the tattoo done saturday, free of charge, so it's all good :)

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    8. Thank you "Unknown" (or s.i.), he agreed on doing some exercises in a Codependency book I'm reading though. It's a start :)

      Delete
    9. Josh refuses to acknowledge your birthday because he had a bad childhood.

      Josh refuses to maintain your shared household unless you pay him to do so, despite paying all of the bills.

      Josh refuses to go to city hall to get papers for your dog, despite having all the free time in the world, because he wants to punish you for not buying his rogaine.

      Josh gives you grief over how you spend money you earn at your job. (which he doesn't do or have)

      Need I continue? Because now you're just being stupid. Good guys don't do that stuff.

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    10. Once he had enough time to realize how sociopathic it is to make a dog suffer because you're a petulant spoiled thirty year old child who has just been scolded by his living breathing bank account. ...

      Josh doesn't exactly step up to the plate to do his boyfriendly duties unless there is something in it for him. And he also knows how to use your feelings against you in punishment quite well. Two signs of a shitty boyfriend.

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    11. josh is too busy at poker,sir. anytime he spends with her .she should treasure and cherish.if she would just loan aka give him another 5k or some1 dies so he can get that beach house i am sure .he could make a living at poker. lol

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    12. Make a dog suffer? How did Josh make our dog suffer?

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    13. Really? He refused to do something to help your poor innocent helpless dog because he was mad at you for not letting him have his way. I know there's a language barrier, but you're missing the point regardless and you're smarter than this.

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    14. He refused to help ME, not our dog. The dog had already had surgery and was recovering fine, I was the one who needed help to get that money back, not the dog, he never hurt our dog, no matter how you put it.

      Besides, he DID go get the papers as I asked and I am getting my money back, so this conversation is pointless.

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    15. My mistake - Josh was punishing you and only you for not doing what he wanted. He fortunately didn't figure out a way to punish the dog directly also.

      Delete
  5. Andrea wrote: "I haven't thought about a time limit yet, it will depend on how the relationship goes and how I feel about helping him."

    Woo hoo, Josh is skating on thin ice now! Here are some more lucrative jobs for him to consider: Aluminum can collector, Coat hanger repairman, Cat shampooer, Hand model, Cufflink designer, Tie tailor, Fortune cookie writer, Poison food test taster, Light bulb changer, Human speed bump, Chewing gum recycler,

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